I had a relapse this past weekend. I walked into a Barnes & Noble with the firm intention of buying only one book. This book was a necessary purchase, in the way that pretty covers and an upcoming bookclub theme make it necessary. And…I had a coupon. Every facet of this purchase was (practically) justified. What helped strengthen my resolve were the just-bought bags of groceries sitting in the back seat. I couldn’t waste time browsing!
Apparently my book of choice hadn’t been offered recently, and they were out of stock. Of course, they could order it for me… “But you don’t understand; I have a coupon!” Now I was at the point that I couldn’t let it go to waste. (Way to go, marketing group!) So I walked out with three new books.
Mind you, I’ve been very good lately about sticking to my “no more buying books until you read the ones you have” resolution. And let’s face it, I didn’t mean all my unread books—I just had to make some progress. Either way you look at it, I’m pretty sure I have a problem (or close to having one?), and I’m pretty sure this qualifies as falling off the wagon.
But confession is good for the soul, right?! And I can be good…for a little while, at least. 😉
I’m finding it hard to believe it’s been more than a year since my last post. So many things have happened in the past year—and not all of them bloggable. Small things, work things, good and bad (though ultimately resolved) things. But through it I pulled inward and quiet, and then got out of the habit of this form of expression.
I just had a birthday, and was taken aback at the number of expressions of felicitation by friends and even mere acquaintances. Small comments, glittery cards, flowers. And it made me confront that little nagging lie that all the little things I’d do (or not do) “didn’t really matter all that much.” Because even though I’m not someone who needs grand accolades, those displays of value truly did matter…and in a way, it showed that others esteemed me more than I esteemed myself, or my own efforts. All because of the little things.
Yet again I was reminded of Proverbs 3:27: “Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it.” And I’m going back to letting this be my motto. Not just in the big gestures, or monetary donations, but in the little dispensings of time and appreciation. In the small expressions of consideration for others. This is the goal for me this year.